Inspired by Dave Anderson’s article at Scarlet Ink.
The Leadership Myth
Whether we say it aloud or not, the intuitive wisdom about leadership (which clearly grew out of the machoism of the mid-twentieth century) is that tough leaders get ahead, but empathetic ones get ignored. It’s such old thinking that it feels instinctive: forceful personalities grab attention and authority. But is dominance really the best long-term strategy?
The False Choice: Empathy vs. Toughness
The myth says leaders must pick between kindness and strength. Reality? The best leaders blend both. They set clear expectations, hold people accountable, and show real care. That balance earns not just respect—but loyalty.
Showing the receipts: Leaders Who Got It Right
Satya Nadella, Microsoft – Shifted the culture from rivalry to collaboration, driving growth through empathy and high standards.
Indra Nooyi, PepsiCo – Demanded performance while investing in employee well-being.
Arne Sorenson, Marriott – Led through crisis with transparent, compassionate communication.
Alan Mulally, Ford – Turned the company around without layoffs, anchoring accountability in trust.
And then there’s what the data says
The Center for Creative Leadership finds empathetic leaders outperform fear-driven ones. Specifically:
- Toughness without empathy leads to disengagement, turnover and low morale.
- Empathy without accountability leads to weak performance and inconsistency.
- The winning formula comes through like a calling: clarity, compassion, and firmness are what work.
The Real Question
Instead of asking if “jerks” climb faster, ask this: What kind of leader sustains success?
Not the soft one. Not the cutthroat one.
The leader who holds the line with empathy, driving performance while building trust.
