Are you seeking a way to express yourself authentically while also, somehow, building deeper connections AND resolving conflicts peacefully? Believe it or not, it’s possible! Nonviolent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg is a must-read. The book offers a transformative approach to expressing your needs and listening with empathy, helping you move beyond blame and judgment toward more authentic, compassionate conversations.
For those of you who have already read this amazing book, the following checklist is designed to provide you with a practical memory support so you can integrate empathy, clarity, and mutual understanding even more easily into your conversations. Use it to transform your communication habits and strengthen your relationships both at work and in life.
Checklist 1: Observations Without Evaluation
Separate facts from interpretations to communicate clearly and avoid judgment.
- Did I clearly distinguish between what I observed and how I interpreted it?
- Did I avoid making assumptions or attaching blame in my observations?
Checklist 2: Identifying Feelings
Recognize and articulate emotions to foster authentic communication.
- Did I accurately identify my own emotions? (Use a list like this if needed.)
- Did I express my feelings without blaming others for causing them?
Checklist 3: Connecting to Needs
Understand the underlying needs behind emotions to create mutual understanding.
- Did I identify the need behind my emotions? (Use a list like this if needed.)
- Did I consider the other person’s potential needs in the situation?
Checklist 4: Making Requests
Communicate actionable, positive requests to meet needs effectively.
- Did I frame my request as a specific, positive action?
- Did I ensure my request was clear and doable, not a demand, but inviting them into the problem-solving process?
Checklist 5: Receiving Empathically
Listen deeply to others to build trust and connection.
- Did I listen without interrupting or planning my response?
- Did I acknowledge the other person’s feelings and needs, even if I disagreed?
Checklist 6: Practicing Self-Empathy
Offer yourself compassion to stay grounded and resilient.
- Did I take a moment to check in with my own feelings and needs?
- Did I practice self-compassion instead of self-criticism when things didn’t go as planned?
Checklist 7: Navigating Conflict Peacefully
Apply the principles of nonviolent communication to resolve conflicts constructively.
- Did I approach the conflict with curiosity rather than judgment?
- Did I focus on mutual understanding and finding solutions that meet everyone’s needs?
How to Use This Checklist
This checklist is a practical tool for integrating the principles of Nonviolent Communication into your interactions. Use it to prepare for important conversations, reflect on past interactions, or as a daily guide to improving your communication habits. With regular practice, you can cultivate empathy, reduce conflict, and build more meaningful connections.
Why You Should Read Nonviolent Communication
If you’re looking to communicate more effectively and build stronger relationships, reading the book Nonviolent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg will deepen your understanding of these concepts and empower you to create lasting, positive change in your communication style. You will find even more and greater ways to practice your new communication skills and stories of how NVC has been used to successfully address the most difficult communication challenges in the world.