I’ve been lucky to know many kind and understanding people in my community. We’ve shared workplaces, community projects, and religious gatherings. But lately, I’ve seen a shift. There’s a heaviness, a kind of sadness and frustration, that wasn’t there before, or at least, not as noticeable.
Recently, a friend shared how the current political climate affects him. He’s been feeling anger, a strong emotion that is both unfamiliar and uncomfortable for someone with his typically gentle nature. It made me think about how many of us are feeling the same.
So, I started asking people a simple yet deep question: “How are you really doing?” At first, the answers were short, but soon, stories of small yet meaningful acts of self-care began to unfold. People are finding comfort in simple pleasures – crafts, playing with pets, family time, meditation, or just a relaxing bath.
In these trying times, I find wisdom in Brené Brown’s work, especially her book Braving the Wilderness. She talks about the need for real human connection, something many of us still miss despite returning to office or having in-person parties. According to Brown, our emotional well-being is tied to sharing both happy and sad moments with others. It’s about feeling that deep, human connection that reminds us we’re not alone.
Image Text: “Spirituality is recognizing and celebrating that we are all inextricably connected to each other by a power greater than all of us, and that our connection to that power and to one another is grounded in love and compassion. Practicing spirituality brings a sense of perspective, meaning and purpose to our lives.” – Brené Brown
In “Hold Hands. With Strangers.”, she talks about how her research revealed that people who experience a sense of true belonging habitually show up to collective experiences of joy and pain. Concerts. Theater. Sports. Funerals. I’ve read this chapter a few times now and each time I have wept my way through it because I’ve had these experiences, and I treasure them. She shares several of her own stories of going to football games with friends, country music concerts with family, movies, and then funerals, natural disasters, and mass shootings.
Being alone in the midst of a widely reported trauma, watching endless hours of twenty-four-hour news or reading countless articles on the Internet, is the quickest way for anxiety and fear to tiptoe into your heart and plant their roots of secondary trauma. That day after the mass killing, I chose to cry with my friends, then I headed to church to cry with strangers.
I’ve heard exhaustion and malaise in those I’ve connected with over the last few years. In many ways, this experience of being alone in the midst of widely reported trauma has become our new normal.
We need to see each other in person and cry together. And we need experiences of joy. Together. Dr. Brown writes further:
…these examples of collective joy and pain are sacred experiences. They are so deeply human that they cut through our differences and tap into our hardwired nature. These experiences tell us what is true and possible about the human spirit. We need these moments with strangers as reminders that despite how much we might dislike someone on Facebook or even in person, we are still inextricably connected. And it doesn’t have to be a big moment with thousands of strangers. We can be reminded of our inextricable connection after talking with a seatmate on a two-hour flight.
In the past few years, many of us have experienced traumas and challenges while isolated, glued to our screens, absorbing every piece of news. It’s draining. But Brown emphasizes that being with others during such times, sharing those collective experiences of joy and pain, is healing. It bridges the gaps that political and personal differences create.
How are you coping? And how can you connect with others to share your experiences and feelings? Reach out to someone, have a real conversation, and if needed, offer or seek support. Our human connection is stronger than any differences in opinion. We’re bound together by shared experiences, emotions, and the fundamental desire to live meaningful lives.
In a world that sometimes seems dominated by division, take a step towards unity. Reach out, share, connect. We need each other – to listen, to understand, to heal.
CREDITS
The image from this post is courtesy of Fancy Features, which creates giant coloring walls for events. Isn’t that awesome? Go check them out at https://www.fancyfeatures.com/ Click me! If you want more tips for being a great leader
Quotes from Brown, Brené. Braving the Wilderness: The Quest for True Belonging and the Courage to Stand Alone (pp. 127-128). Random House Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.
